Ah, feedback. The writer's favorite and least favorite thing.
Feedback is a critical and crucial part of any writer's development. It helps us to grow, to discover new techniques, to pinpoint our flaws, and to celebrate our strengths. I know a lot of writers dread sharing their work, and honestly, I did too for quite some time. But feedback is critical to creating a strong, well-rounded, confident writer. I promise.
So you may be wondering - how can I improve my nerves about sharing my work? How can I be sure my work will be appreciated, while also ensuring I get the most constructive feedback I possibly can? Never fear! I'm here to help.
Where to start:
Find people you trust. This is probably the most important part of this process. Not only should you find people that you trust to give you good feedback, but you should trust them to not steal your work, not tear you down, and to understand how to give good feedback that is helpful (and not just "oh this was so good" constantly, that doesn't help you, I promise).
Set boundaries for the kind of feedback you want. Are you only looking for story feedback? Are you only looking for line edits? What kind of feedback are you seeking from your readers/editors? Establishing that from the get-go will ensure both you and your readers have firm expectations for that round of feedback. If you share your work with the intention of only wanting small bits of feedback and you get big picture critique instead, that won't feel too great. Boundaries and expectations protect both you and your readers from stumbling into a situation neither of you want.
Approach their feedback with a growth mindset. Sharing your work, especially if you've never done it before, is terrifying. This is why you find people you trust first - you know that they're here to help you, not criticize you unfairly. Your editors and readers are here to help you, and approaching their feedback with that in mind helps you to absorb their comments and give you a good frame of mind to act upon it.
Once you get their feedback:
Let it marinate. Instead of jumping into their comments right away, sometimes it's best to let it sit for a time when you are ready. You may not like every comment they make - and that's okay! That's the point of feedback. Approaching it when you are ready is the best way to ensure it will actually prove helpful to you.
Remember they're critiquing your work, not you as a person. Don't take their feedback as an attack on you personally. Since these are people you trust, they're here to help you grow, not tear you down. Don't take their comments too personally - instead, think of it as strength training. You may hate it, and it may not feel great, but in the end it will make you stronger.
Remind yourself of the good they see. Reader and editor feedback won't always be negative. In fact, most of your readers will comment more often on things they enjoyed or pieces they liked! This is a great way to balance and curb your expectations, and make you feel positively about the things they critique.
Consider the way you critique others' writing. This is a fantastic way to put yourself on the other side of the table, to consider where your readers are coming from when they make certain critiques. Of course, this kind of exercise is incredibly challenging - it's really hard to think of your own work objectively. But putting yourself in your readers' shoes will make it easier to approach their feedback from a place of growth, instead of defensiveness.
Implementing their feedback:
You don't have to take every piece of feedback. Regardless of what others may tell you, you are ultimately in control of your story. You don't have to take every single piece of feedback that is given. Maybe it doesn't fit with the lesson you want your story to tell. Maybe it changes a character in a way you don't like. Maybe you just don't want to do it because it doesn't jive with you! That's okay. Feedback isn't the end-all-be-all. It's not compulsory to implement all feedback (and in fact, it might be impossible - some feedback directly clashes with other feedback!), and at the end of the day, its your story.
Consider things that come up more often than others. Did a lot of your readers say this chapter confused them? Did you get a lot of comments about how they didn't understand why this character was in the story? Those are the kinds of comments that you should pay attention to - trends are important to notice in feedback, and tell a story in and of themselves. Evaluating why your readers are agreeing on this thing is a great place to start when implementing feedback.
Thank your readers for their time and effort! I can't stress this one enough. Your early readers and editors are committing a LOT of time and effort into reading your stories. They're not just reading for enjoyment - they're reading to help you grow, and that takes more effort than you'd realize! Thanking them helps you appreciate their work, and keeps them wanting to come back to help you even more. Gratitude goes a long way, and a simple thank you is never a bad idea.
This is an incredibly complex topic, and I could probably go on for another fourteen years about feedback and why it's so important for a writer's growth. But I hope this list will at least get you started on taking feedback with grace. Because approaching things from a place of learning instead of defensiveness will always benefit you in the end.
Happy critiquing, and don't forget to thank your readers. :)
Until next time,
Tia